Who the bloody hell am I to question you?who am I,indeed,to question even myself?I am merely a ghost,hunted by rotten spirits,a shadowy figure on it’s way to darkness,hunted by cerberus’,cursed creatures which will never leave me be,a stranger on a dark alley never worth to pay attention at,the were of a powerful man,with greate ambitions and even greater dreams which were cruely crushed,smashed,sliced in tiny pieces never to be found again,lost in star dust,loneliness,grieving the past and forgetting his own future!
I could merely call myself human,if I ever was something human there you’ve left,if there were feelings left in me after you’ve been gone,after you kissed me for the last time,and that was the time when I felt your lips cruely killing everything that was human,feeling bounded,in me;when I felt your silky touch with it’s coldness,cutting my skin like a katana cutting a piece of paper,when my spirit was teared apart from my body and both of them continue living in different states : the spirirt with it’s loneliness and grief and the body always forced to keep up,forced to keep going forward despite all that pain,forced to smile and with it’s visible scars and still lingering kisses on it,both of them crying,screaming for you,for your presence,for your soft silky,delicate touch,your moistured lips and your dream inducer voice!
I’m just a bloody ruin of what I used to be because you had made me happy all those years,the heappiest man alive and yet,now you’re demolishing my walls slowly slowly,brick by brick with your dissapearence,leaving the castle’s called happiness heart rusting and rottening!
Who am I to judge you?who am I,indeed,to judge even myself?
I’m just a nothing,a useless thing,without any kind of feeling or warmness,a guitar with broken chords,a blind painter,a deaf composer,a dumb genius,and will continue be,all my life maybe,all my time spent without you,I’ll be nothing until your returning!
It would have been houndred times better to kill me than leave me because the death it’s just a new beginning,a new life,a new path and I would preffer death instead of this bloody cursed pain because this pain will always be with me until I’ll be dead!This pain will keep following both my body and spirit everywhere they go and no matter how much and how hard they’ll try to hide from it,sooner or later this pain will just find them!
You’ve left me without options,without nothing to live or fight for,you’ve left me just this pain,sleepless nights,dark days and an empty place right next to me in the bed!And yet,so far,I’m patient,I’m still waiting for you,fighting against my pain,my deamons to be and also my daily fears;I’m still waiting for your wake-up call,realising what I feel for you ,and I’ll never give up on you,I’ll always be here,I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!
